I have anxiety, but I also have a story.
Anxiety has ruined my teenage years. I’ve sat back and watched everyone else grow up, get bigger friendship groups, get boyfriends or girlfriends. Yet I still stayed the same. I went with everyone else yet I became so lost. I’ve got this voice and this mind full of opinions and views yet its so trapped and that’s what upsets me the most. The fact that im scared to be me incase people don’t like me
But the truth is hiding everything isn’t getting me anywhere so shouldn’t I just be me?
I cant act like I’ve had it bad. Yes my parents split up but everyone’s seem to now a days. They both are amazing. I’ve had friends all my life and I’ve never been bullied. I’ve had boyfriends who I loved and still tell me they want it all again but still absolutely terrified. The idea of letting someone in, finding out your perfections and imperfections scares me. I hate being alone, but i hate letting someone get close so im never going to be happy.
But at the same time im the happiest I’ve ever been. If you had asked me a few years ago if i wanted to wake up each morning the answer would have been no. I honestly didn’t care if i was dead or alive. I got to the point where i didn’t want to walk down the street incase someone looked at me and of course they would be judging me. But now I go out, kiss boys, have fun and im honestly happy.
I know i have a long way to go but that distance is shorter then the one it took to get here. And that excites me. Because finally i can look forward to actually being me once and making my dreams and ambitions happen instead of watching everyone else around me happen.
Im basically saying if you want to recover you can.